Well, ok, y’all must admit, it IS pretty catchy, amiright??? It is spelled this way due to availability, but in retrospect, it’s actually pretty perfect.
Well, not EVERYONE understands how this may connect to me (PLEASE, I’m serious!) Despite some negative connotations (prima donna, SPOILED, high maintenance, ahem...good singer) that can go along with this moniker, I choose instead to associate it with the OG definition. A Goddess! Now, THIS, I can identify with. In the sense of a ‘Glinda the Good Witch’ style of Goddess that is!
The ‘Diva’ section of ‘DivaDotCalm’ encourages you to embrace your inner Goddess...whatever that means to you… to ME it means smiling and flirting with my reflection in the mirror. Seeing the importance of elevating rituals to maintain my health and happiness. This looks like RADICAL self love, and care. Imagine worshipping your inner self the way an ancient person may have worshipped a Goddess??!!?? THAT!!! (disclaimer, not actually ‘worshipping’ in the religious sense’ let’s say’ fangirling’ instead, shall we?) Ok, so what if your #WCW was YOURSELF?!?!?! Because you are beautiful, smart, strong, funny and caring. (whoa, you sound pretty awesome….let’s grab a coffee!!) Makes sense?
While this could be overlooked as utilitarian vehicle to connect the other two terms, it is actually a representation of all the times I have, and continue to play small. It is a remind
er that no matter how much I grow, and play ‘bigger’....there is ALWAYS more work to do!
Again, not EVERYONE understands how this may connect to me!! AND, again I’ll a
dmit this was a choice initially born out of necessity. And now, I LOVE IT! My fave part of this definition is this part right here:
(of the sea) not disturbed by large waves
Right in the eff’ing FEEELS people! While I MAY have a tendency to appear outgoing, extroverted, and at times, squirrely, I have learned/am learning the value of NOT BEING DISTURBED BY LARGE (or small) WAVES.
In the past, whenever I had been ‘wronged’ I would often earn sympathy, as well as gather fighters in my cause by re-t
elling and re hashing an event over, and over, and over. Seeking agreement in my ‘rightness’ and basking in the glow of outrage that people would express at my having been ‘wronged’ Let’s put this thought on pause for a second <pause>
A few years back, at a Yoga teacher development event, I learned that by starting a ‘Gratitude Practice’ w
e can actually INCREASE our happiness/satisfaction response by simply recalling a few happy events at the end of a day. Our brains respond to the memory of the happy incident just as if it were actually occurring!! So, in other words, a 2-4-1 special on happiness? And all you have to do is give gratitude??? DING. DING! (Thank you Chilly for this GEM that sits beautifully polished amongst my collection!)
<end pause> aaaanddd...we’re back. So, after learning this little ditty about re-living our happy experiences and benefiting, I realized that this behaviour pattern of regurgitating the negative stuff/the ‘shit happens’ and/or the ‘LARGE WAVES’ moments in life had a HUGE COST to my well being. By constantly and repeatedly re-hashing and re-telling the details of an event that made me feel ‘shitty’ - I was performing the emotional equivalent of hauling out a ‘Mr. Turtle Pool’ and filling it with shit. But instead of getting out the hose to clean it up….I sitting down and rolling around in it!!!!! UGH! Now, this DOES st
ill happen once in a while. I’ve mostly ‘evolved’ from being in a victim mode, to being able to handle confrontation, but I still get triggered when people are jerks, even if
I maintain the upper hand. I may be able to ‘kill them with kindness’ in the moment, but I do sometimes love to rehash if someone is being a special kind of stupid. I’m human. But I also recognize the cost of doing this, and I’m working on it.
I also used to have an unhea
lthy addiction to CHAOS in ALL areas of my life. FOMO was running wild in my veins, and I would constantly leave things to the last minute, and live in a generally chaotic state. Some of this was by chance, but quite a large share was by choice. I’ve broken up with things that don’t serve me, as well as some that were out of alignment with my goals, and m
y wellness. I am learning and practicing the fine art of saying NO! And it’s hella uncomfortable. But I’m gaining some ground! And it feels GOOD!
So yeah...I choose Calm instead. I choose to RESPOND to my world. Not REACT. I chose to Meditate (a little) to Appreciate (a LOT) and to start and finish each day with a grateful heart.
So, there you have it folks. DivaDotCalm